I must say it has been a very interesting week.Still not able to head back to work. Although I am improving very slowly but surely.The weather has been absolutely amazing. I must say the past two days of been watching movies.The first one was Friends with Kids I must say it was not what I was expecting however it did have so funny moments.The second movie I watched was the most uplifting, spiritual, empowering movie I've seen in a very long time. It was Soul Surfer.Again not what I expected but I fell in love with everything about the movie. I would recommend it to anyone. Blessings!!!

Thankful Thursday!!! I can begin by saying this week as been extremely challenging to say the least. Struggling with physiotherapy to get better and back to work is so much more difficult than I thought it would be.On a good note I went from 8 percent movement to 17 percent movement.Trying to get better within three weeks to go back to work is proving to be quite a challenge to say the least.I'm so very thankful for my job and that at the end of the day I really do love it.The people I work with are great.I'm thankful that we all get along and have fun.I am so very thankful for all the great weather that we are having?Just wishing I wasn't in so much pain to enjoy it more. I'm so very thankful that my son made it home safely from his trip.I'm so thankful for every single breath I take,from God giving me courage to finally send that long-awaited letter to my Dad.I am so very thankful for my family. Blessings and Hugs!!! When pride comes ,then comes dishonour,but with humility comes wisdom..,Proverbs 11:2

Wow It has been so long since I,ve posted.I didn't realize how much little time I would actually have once I went back to school full time all while working full time and being a single parent.What a whirlwind of a year it has been.I have a question and would love to hear feedback on this please.So to all my friends out there..,How does one go about truly leaving the past and mistakes that your parents think were mistakes in the past, when they won't? I am not the same 17 year old who had a baby out of wedlock.How do I make them see this? I know I haven't always made the best choices.I have two wonderful children that I raised all by myself one is 22 and attending the Vancouver Art Institution.My youngest just graduated.What more could I ask for? I am so thankful for my children who are my light,my best friends. I am so thankful for my sisters and the chance we have been givin to know each other.Building a bond with them has been a wonderful experience and I thank God every day for that. I am so thankful that my Mom's cancer seems to be in remission...,even though I won't truly except it. I am so thankful that my brother who has Ducehnne's Muscular Dystrophy will be turning 25 in Sept. I am so thankful for all the wonderful weather we are having.., even though I have a back injury and am off work. I am so thankful for my wonderful friends who show that I am loved and wanted. I am so thankful for my daughters trip home even though it was only a week. With everything I know that with each new struggle, with each new challenge with each new hurt with each thought doubt of self worth I know that I am never alone.That our father is always there. Whatever is true,whatever is noble,whatever is right,whatever is pure,whatever is lovely,whatever is of good report-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-I will think about such things.The things I have learned and received and heard and seen in those who walk with Christ,I will practise,and the God of peace will be with me. Philippines:8-9 God Bless and have a beautiful day..,hugs.peace and love.

My Baby is all grown up!!!

Never thought I would be filled with so much pride and happiness as I did the day my baby graduated.Has it really been 17 years ago you came screaming into my world.You were making a statement to the world I'm here whatcha gonna do with me..?You are one to watch you posses the strength courage and love to make changes in this world.Why without realizing it you take a stand every day on bullying.You won't stand for unfairness or mistreatment of anyone.You have grown up from an innocent baby,toddler,teen and into the young adult you are becoming.Your actions every day no matter how small are changing the world we live in I am so very very proud of you..

Heard a Song.., Made me think of you

Heard this song and it made me think of you, yet again it is the time of year for the hustle and bustle of Christmas.With this brings people always in a hurry to go where, I don't know? With this brings rudeness, no patience and least of all understanding.Why the happiest time of the year is filled with less than love is beyond my understanding.It has been a very long time since you've been gone on thet christmas morning but you have never been forgotten. For I wish that you were here with me now. That you could have been here all these years ,that you could have been here to have seen your great gradchildren almost all grown up. I know how you loved christmas.I know how you felt family was the most important thing. I know how you always told me that love is the heart of the world.That all the riches in the world didnt mean anything without love.As I've gotten older i've come to realize just how right you were there is nothing more important than love. Love does make the world go round. I miss you Grandpa!!!

Thankful Thursday!!!

Have you ever thought wow am I ever going to see the light at the end of the tunnel?It has been a year since my last post and so much has happened that has made me be especially thankful.
I am so thankful everyday that the drs caught my mom's colon cancer and were able to remove it. Mom says that they got it all and she is going to be ok.I want to believe it however I just can't yet.
I am thankful for being able to have taken my Mom to all her treatments and blood work on tues and weds every two weeks for almost a year, for that is a time i will always cherish.
I am thankful to still have my brother with us for he almost passed three times last year.For those that don't know my Brother has Duchennes Muscular Dystrophy.
I am so thankful that during this very low time in my lfe I was able to build a great relationship with my sisters,who are my Dad's girls.(remarried)
I am so thankful for Gods 's love patience and understanding with me as there have been many times over the past year where I was at a loss.
I am so thankful for my many friends who were beside me everyday sending me love encouraging words, hope and just being there during my familys darkest ours.
I am so very thankful that we were all together for thanksgiving, when a year ago I wasnt sure that would be possible.

Thankful Thursday!!!

I know what it means to be thankful as I practise thankfulness everyday but sometimes it feels good to acknowledge what we are truly thankful for.I love to sit and reflect what I'm thankful for.
I'm thnkful for my family and the time i get to spend with them even if it is in the hospital or the drs.
I'm thankful for the chemo treatments that mom is recieving to help her get better!
I'm thnksful for wonderful friends who in this storm are there just to listen.
I'm thankful for the sun we have been getting first year i actually got a tan without trying.
I'm thankful for new things that come into my life good or bad!
I'm thankful for my many blogger friends who lend an ear or a few incouraging words!!
So until next week Blessings!!!Hugs!!!

A season is a season,,,,

We are always told that things come in seasons but when you see those seasons happen and change right in front of your eyes it is sometimes overwhelming.I always have believed that things happen for a reason and it is out of my control.That God doesn't give us anything we can't handle but what if he does? Then what? Recently i have felt that i have been given too much too handle and i haven't been quite sure how to deal with it all.
After almost losing my baby brother(22)he is 15 years younger than me my family has been faced with yet another surgery for him.He has two options and one is operate on his vocal cords and he will not have a voice.
the second is move his feeding tube from where it is to his small intestine,which is very risky and he may not be strong enough to come out of the surgery this time. my mom has started chemotherapy after having surgery for colon cancer.the surgery was successful however with the chemo treatments she is tired and we don't know what the future may hold.
My heart condition is still being worked out and has resulted with me being on medication for it for the rest of my life.
But with all of this going on it has been so hard to not be mad,angry,sad and that is where my depression as come in.For the first time in my life trying to be strong has been the hardest thing for me to do.I know that this will all pass and in time we will move into another season but in the mean time can't i say that this is just too much!!! blessings everyone till thursday!!!

Thankful thursday!!

Greeting my loved ones in the world of blogging!! I have so many things to be thankful to report this week so sorry if I'm off topic.
For many of you know we almost lost my brother to hid fight with duchenne muscular dystrophy. on the 16Th!! of May.Then i recently discovered i do in fact have my dad's heart condition which was fortunately found to a reaction to an antidepressant.My family had just about had enough when my mom was diagnosed with colon cancer and i am proud to say that surgery on the 31st was a success,just awaiting to find out about kemo now!!
How we also received so very good news with my significant other,his mom's cancer is now in remission,all the while he was in Ontario for all my family's rough three weeks!!I am so very thankful for the wonderful doctors whose hands are in god's.I am thankful for modern medicine and for my Dr's faith in not giving up on my heart.Yes there could be a near surgery.
I am so very thankful for all the love and support everyone has shown our family!!
Blessings night all til next week!!hugs thankyou for being so open and listening and being a friend!!

Thankful Thursday

I gone honestly say that im struggling with not being mad with your heavenly father.
The past week and a half have been very struggling for my family.
My brother who is 22 almost passed away and i know that he won't be struggling anymore but why?? Then i started a new medication,which brought out an underlying heartcondition, so hopefully i don't end up in ht hospital with heart surgery(20th) when it started.To make matters worse my mom has been diagnosed with colon cancer her surgery is on the 31st.
Even though all of this is happening my faith is not shaken and i am thankful for the dr's care and compassion.
I am thankful for my friends that are there.
I am thankful for the love that our father in heaven has for me.
I am thankful for the bits of peace that he has given me.
I am thankful for his healing!!! blessings!!!

Why more challenges!!

Well I must say that May has brought my family many challenges.Many which are making me wonder does God really only give us more than we can handle? My Mom who is my brother and i's rock has finally got her tests back and it has been confirmed that she has colon cancer!On sunday may 16th my brother almost passed away. I started a new medication that shot my heart rate sky high on tuesday the 18th of may and now it has been found that i possibly have my dad's heart condition,which almost took his life at 48.I am beyond scared but i know that I am not alone and nothing is in my control.Sorry for such a sad report but i feel so broken,lost,angry and sad!!!Wishing you all a wonderful week!!!Blessings!!!!!

Thankful Thursday!!!

Wow where did April go??
I must say that April has been a month that has brought alot of joy,pain and sorrow for my family!
The beginning of April brought a move into a new place for my family which has been exciting and filled with adventure. I fell down our stairs and was off work and laid up for about two weeks,and I'm thankful that I didn't break anything!!I am now back at work off my crutches and my leg is a beautiful rainbow of colors! My fall brought a new level of patience and grace for me,You know it is so hard to realize that your way of doing things isn't necessarily someone Else's.
April brought excellent grades for my children in school I am so thankful that their hard work payed off!!Couldn't be prouder of my children!
I am thankful for the miracles of modern medicine and still am praying that my mom will be ok,I know our relationship has been strained.
I am thankful for God who is allowing the healing to partake in our lives!
I am thankful for the wonderful friends I have who no matter what Love me.
I am thankful for the sunshine that we have been given.
I am thankful to have such a forgiving Father who has shown me the way and who will never leave my side no matter what the storm may be!!!
I am thankful for the many friends I have who take the time to read my blog or just stop by and say hi!!!

Have you ever..,

felt so completly alone as if noone understands you? I ahve been feeling that way alot and im not sure why?For i know that I am never truly alone.Sometimes I just want to crawl back into bed and hide under the covers for it all to pass.The struggles I am going through right now I now are going to pass with time.I know that God doesn't give me anything I can't handle but why does it always have to be at the same time?
My mom asked me just after my uncle passsed away if I believe what a coworker of hers does?9 we got to the same church)I said yes!She asked me how i could!I said because I believe.I have blindfaith and believe in the power of prayer.I also believe that Jesus died on the cross for my sins.I told her i know that is is hard to not understand but how does she not know that my brother is still here with us because I pray every night for one more day with him?!Those who don't know my baby brother has duchenne's Muscular dystrophy and is only 22.I wholeheartdly believe my prayers are being answered.She has also asked how i can have peace with my illness,my son's,my dad's and possibly hers?I told her it is not in my control and once i realized that the peace came!!!

Thankful thursday!!!

center>center
Wow I must say I truly love spring,even though that was when i tumbled down my stairs and have been on crutches the whole time.So as luck would have it i finally get outside to rain!!Isn't the Lord funny!!!Spring is such a beautiful time to get outside and just be one with God!
This week I am thankful for the sunshine and the warmth that it brings.
I am thankful for the birds cheerful songs in the morning!
I am thankful for the happiness the sun puts in my heart!
I am thankful for the new growth we get to witness!
I am thankful for clear warm nights,and stars that shine oh so bright!!
I am so very thankful for my family,friends who love me for me!!!
So everyone get outside and enjoy the sun..,Blessings!!!!
Yes, i will bless the Lord and not forget the glorious things he does for me.
He forgives all my sins.He heals me. Psalm 103:2-3

Thankful Thursday!!!

Well here I am again a day late!!
I went to church last Thursday and the sermon was on discernment.It has been a long time since i have even heard the church talk about this subject.I for one am so glad that was spoke of.I know that with everyday life we all get so busy and caught up that this is often forgotten.
This week I am thankful for family and many of you who follow my blog know that we are awaiting test results for my mom to come back negative!!
I am thankful for my wonderful children who are helping me so very much in my time of need,as i have fallen down my stairs and have limited mobility!!
I am thankful for the wonderful sunshine and warm weather even though i can't really get out to enjoy it!!
I am thankful for my wonderful friends who love me for being me even if that means loving my clumsiness!! Till next week,blessings.., hugs!!

Thankful Thursday!!!

Oh I have so much to be thankful for as it has been so long since i posted!
I am thankful for my children who love me unconditionally even when i know i don't deserve it.
I am thankful for wonderful friends with whom i would be lost without.
I am thankful for the bond i am rebuilding with my mom.
I am so thankful that I have found a new place to move into in time.
I am thankful that when i died my hair this time it didn't go burgundy again,OK i know that is silly but i am.
I am thankful for the beautiful weather we are having,spring is here!!
I am thankful for long talks and quiet evenings with my someone special!!
I am thankful for my son's good grades in school!
I am thankful for the air i breathe each and everyday.
I am thankful for our fathers love and grace that we recieve each and every day!!
Blessings!!!

Time for spring cleaning!!!

Wow i must post must post.., I must begin by saying that i usually love spring cleaning however this year I'm moving like on Sat.So i should be thankful that it will be easier as I am acomplishing two things at once.It is just i really really don't like moving!!Anyhow my tests finally came back and my liver is failing not sure what that totally means but it now explains my son's doing tha same thing.I found this song and fell in love with it,so here it is...............

Long time since my last post..,

Have you ever been so scared that you don't really know what to do?The last month and a half i have been having pains in my back and side and stomach. Well i finally went to the dr's and they did lots of blood work and other tests,to only get called to have to go back in.Some of my tests have come in and it isn't good.So now i'm thinking why did i wait so long?
I never wanted a life with regret but i have one regret.A dear family friend passed away yesterday. I only went to see him once in the last month.I couldn't bring myself to go back and see him it just hurt too much and i wish i had been there everyday.I keep thinking what kind of friend was I.
He taught my brother and i soo very much.He believed in me and my dreams even when i didn't.He was always there to talk to, to listen to,he was supportive and understanding and loving.And now he is gone and the pain is so overwhelming.I will always remember our motorcycle rides.I will always remember his smile,laugh and his kind and gentle heart.

Thankful Thursday.., ahh i'm a day late again!!!

Well this week I'm late due to a sinus cold,which is taking forever to go away.
I am so thankful for so much each and every day that sometimes it is hard to write down what i am most thankful for..,
I am so very thankful for the life i have been given,to be able to wake up knowing I am not alone.
I am thankful for my two wonderful,loving and caring children, with whom are my entire world.
I am thankful for my two beautiful sisters and my amazing brother.
I am thankful for the blossoming relationship with my mom.
I am thankful for my home church and all my wonderful family that I miss so very much each and everyday.
I am so very thankful for the simple things in life!!!
Blessings!!!
I leave you all with this

I finally got the courage..,

After a long break from church i finally had the courage to go back.It wasn't because I didn't want to.It was because I moved away from my home church,from what was familiar and was and always will be family.As i got ready yesterday i wanted to not go but there was like a pull telling me to go.So i went and was i glad i did as it was my pastor's last Sunday here before returning home.I had been feeling lost, cranky and was missing something.Now i know what i was missing.I never realized what a big part my beliefs play in my life until now. I don't know why sometimes we think we can do better on our own without God.I certainly can't I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason and it is all in god's timing.Why with the things that have happened in my life lately the good an bad I know i just need to trust in him.For no harm will come. i leave you with
Phillipians 4:11-13
I want to learn to be content in whatever circumstances I am in.Whether I am abased or in abundance,whether I am filled or hungry,I want to learn the secret of being content in any and situation.
I can do all things through Him who strenghtens me.